'Earth just dropped a penguin update': Scientists discover brand-new penguin species in 100 years, and animal aficionados worldwide lose their minds over how cute it is

Wake up, babe, a new penguin just dropped!

It was just a boring day in the middle of the week. We were all going to work, stuck in the commute traffic, or trying to take a break from all the new tasks your boss threw at your desk, and suddenly - a gust of good news washed over you. You discover what science has literally just discovered before you - a new penguin species! It's not every day that scientists discover a new animal to add to the wonderful wildlife collection of nature, so when they do - it's a reason to celebrate. Forget work, forget chores, forget the troubles of the day - there's a new suited bird in town who needs a welcoming party.

So who is this new neighbor on Earth Street? This absolutely adorable species is called the Southeastern Gentoo. Now, there are already Gentoo penguins, this is an established wildlife family: the Northern Gentoo from the Falkland Islands and South America, the Southern Gentoo from the Antarctic Peninsula and South Georgia Island, and the Eastern Gentoo who lives on several sub-Antarctic islands. But the fourth Gentoo penguin was literally hiding in plain sight. It's not "new", just newly discovered. Their DNA separated from the rest of the Gentoo family almost half a million years ago!

And this is, ladies and gentlemen, the Southeastern Gentoo penguin. The newest wild animal addition to our knowledge of nature. What a delight to open a boring midweek day with.